We often think that we’re protecting people’s feelings by concocting an excuse. (I would love to come to your party, but my in-laws are in town.) “There’s no need to be that specific. And because you lied, you now do have something to feel guilty about,” says Heen. Plus, you set yourself up to have to lie again. (How was that visit?) It’s likely, in our Instagram age, that you’ll be busted anyway.