And how to stick with it, even when it's difficult. 

By Real Simple
Updated July 30, 2015

The sentiments in wedding vows are often fairly consistent: to never let each other down, to always be best friends, and so on. But as the years go by and marital stressors pile up, keeping these promises can often seem more humorous than realistic. Journalist Ada Calhoun perfectly captures the love-hate relationship many people have with both their partners and the institution of marriage itself in her viral New York Times Modern Love article, "The Wedding Toast I'll Never Give."

In the latest episode of "The Labor of Love," one of Real Simple’s podcasts, host and editor Lori Leibovich talks to Calhoun about marital discontent and negotiation, and what prompted her to write such an honest, personal piece. They discuss the Buddhist principle that has helped Calhoun with her own marriage, how to navigate inevitable attraction to other people, and the reader responses that touched Calhoun the most. Listen to the full episode below, and don’t forget to subscribe on iTunes.