Wedding Ceremony and Reception: How to Choose the Perfect Location
Whether you're envisioning a traditional chapel ceremony; a beachy, barefoot lobster bake; or a destination wedding in Bali, here's what you need to keep in mind
Debra McClinton
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1. How many people do you want to attend, and how mobile are they?
Does your dream wedding involve a small guest list of close friends and family or a Broadway-worthy production of everyone you’ve ever met? Your answer may determine the location for you. Why? Even though the day is about you, it’s also about them your guests, that is. You have to anticipate the needs of your nearest and dearest or they may not be able to bear witness to your wedding. If your closest friends all have toddlers, is it fair to request their presence at a safari wedding in South Africa? If many relatives are elderly, can you expect them to make it safely to the beach? You won’t be able to please everyone, but consider making a concession or two if it means that your loved ones will attend.
2. Do you want a religious ceremony?
Fifty-three percent of couples who wed in 2007 did so in a church, according to “The Wedding Report.” A few things to consider:
If you want a traditional religious ceremony, you might be required to have it in a place of worship, so be sure to ask up front. For example, if you’re Catholic and want a Mass, you’ll probably be required to have the ceremony in a Catholic church. (In these cases, book the date at your place of worship before you book your reception location.) Also, some religious establishments frown upon elaborate decorations or flowers as well as skin-baring dresses, so ask about these details.
If you and your fiancé have different religious beliefs, consider having the ceremony at a neutral location, like a reception hall, so you won’t offend any of his or your family members. And talk early on with both families about your decisions.
If organized religion does not play a role in your lives but you want to incorporate a spiritual element, consider hosting the ceremony in a natural setting, such as a beach or a park (be sure to ask about a permit), with the officiant reading a nondenominational poem.
3. How much work are you willing or do you want to take on?
Depending on your location, you may have to do some heavy lifting. But before you commit to an “I do”-it-yourself undertaking, weigh the pluses and minuses of these different settings:
A Unique Location (Home, Destination, Quirky): You may have your heart set on a big wedding-day hoedown in a picturesque barn, but who’s going to clear out the hay, haul in the tables, set up the Porta Potties, arrange for lighting, and oh yeah move Bessie out to pasture? There’s also Mother Nature to keep in mind. If you’re planning an outdoor ceremony or reception, you’ll need a backup plan in the case of rain, which means twice as much work.
A Reception Hall: The establishment usually has a one-size-fits-all feel, but its staff is probably well equipped to take care of the dirty work for you, which may include and this is important post-party cleanup.
Money-Saving Tip: If you can handle the potential stress level of rapidly planned nuptials, booking a location four to six months away from the date may prevent you from blowing your whole budget. If a site isn’t booked within that time period, they might negotiate with you to get some business, rather than have no business at all.