What Happens If: You sweet-talk the rep.

What the Experts Say: Turning on the charm certainly won’t hurt. “If you use a little kindness and respect, it’s amazing what you can get,” says Emad Ghobrial, who runs the Preferred Group, a Los Angeles concierge service that makes thousands of customer-service calls each year for its clients. “You want to make the person on the other end of the line want to help you.”

But you don’t want to be so pleasant that you seem like a pushover. “If you’re calling about a problem and you don’t sound upset, you’re probably not going to get the person’s attention,” says Katie Sloan of IntelliShop, an Ohio-based firm that works with companies to help them test their service representatives. So, in addition to being nice, be firm and unapologetic about asking for help. “In my own calls, I am as polite as possible, but I also make it clear from the beginning that I’m not going anywhere until this matter gets resolved,” says Kat Morrill, a former technical-support agent for an Alabama-based Internet service provider. “You can’t let the rep run you over, because a lot of them would rather have you off the phone dissatisfied than on the phone and happy.” (Reps are often paid on the basis of how quickly they process the calls they receive.)

Also, don’t let the rep use a friendly rapport as a cover for being vague. “If you ask a question and she says, ‘I think so,’ that’s not really an answer — it’s just intended to get you off the phone,” says Dawn Hampton, a certified medical-reimbursement specialist in Santa Barbara, California. “Tell her that you need a definite answer.”

Bottom Line: An affable, respectful attitude is best, but let your manner express both the importance of your mission and your determination to see things resolved to your liking. And if you’re trying to unravel a company error, go ahead and tell the rep how frustrated you are with the situation, without, however, implicating her as part of the problem. Instead, treat her as if she’s your salvation.