Back in September, I invited readers to write in to tell me what was on their minds, and I promised I would answer some of the e-mails here in this column. Well, I can’t thank you enough for your hundreds of marvelous, heartfelt, candid letters. You guys are smart, thoughtful, incisive, and articulate. You are also pressured, frustrated, puzzled, overwhelmed, and worried about not living up to anyone’s expectations, let alone your own. Well, I’ve got some good news for you: You’re not alone. In fact, most of your questions and concerns fell neatly into five categories. (Yes, that means there’s quite a large group of terrific women out there who share the same concerns as you.) Let’s look at the categories one at a time.

1. Is it too late?

Becky, from Cumming, Georgia, who is in her 50s, writes that she is divorced, her kids are off at college, and, since she has always been a stay-at-home mom, she now has (in her view) no marketable skills: “Where do I go from here? Is my life really over? Am I too old, too poor, too unskilled to look at dreams?”

Becky, it’s understandable that at the moment you feel as if it’s over. The fact is, it’s nowhere near over. But it is time for a new beginning, and everything in your life is giving you that message. Try these three steps.

Step 1: Stop piling up bad thoughts. All that negativity is sapping your energy and robbing you of the optimism you need to step out. When those thoughts float into your mind, hit Delete and replace them with a mantra, like “Today I will choose faith over fear” or a song that makes you feel great and sticks in your head. I’ve written about power songs before, but if you don’t have one, go to www.realsimple.com/motivator. Scroll down to “Find Your Song” and take one from the long list of power songs from staffers and readers.

Step 2: Shift your thinking. Instead of thinking, I don’t have what they want, try thinking, What can I give that would make me happy? That slight shift can make a huge difference.

Step 3: Make two lists. List the things that bring you joy and all the ways you can bring joy to others. Then see where they intersect and start your search there. Try calling a charitable organization that appeals to you and asking for an interview. These places tend to be more willing than large corporations to take on people who want to develop job skills. Tell them you have a lot to give and are eager to make a difference. Remember — the work you do now doesn’t have to be what you do forever. The point is to get out there.