Ask yourself whether you’re avoiding everyday situations because they make you anxious, says Judy Lake Chessa, coordinator of the Anxiety and Phobia Treatment Center, in White Plains, New York. If the answer is yes, you have a phobia, not a fear. “I may have a fear of, say, elevators, but I still ride in them,” explains Chessa. “If I had a phobia of elevators, I would avoid them completely.”

So what causes phobias? They usually stem from a genetic predisposition to anxiety. Typically, people with phobias are not scared that, for instance, the plane will fall from the sky; they’re anxious about reliving the panic they felt the last time they boarded a plane. “People who have panic attacks are often afraid they’re going to die or go crazy or embarrass themselves,” says Chessa. “It’s a fear of losing control.” So, yes, the fear can be fear itself.