Your husband says he’s tired all the time. Getting out of bed is a struggle for him; he’s grumpy when he comes home, too. How do you know whether it’s just a foul mood or serious depression? “The blues are temporary,” says Mitch Golant, Ph.D., the author of What to Do When Someone You Love Is Depressed (Owl Books, $15, www.amazon.com). “Depression lasts longer and has a number of symptoms.” Pessimism, hopelessness, constant worry, and an “I can’t do anything right” attitude are signs. So are changes in sleeping and eating patterns — doing more or less of either — and an increase in drinking. Headaches, digestive problems, and back pain can also be hints. “Depressed people often lose interest in hygiene,” says Douglas Jacobs, a psychologist and the founder of National Depression Screening Day (October 6), when free consultations will be offered nationwide (www.mentalhealthscreening.org). Any mention of suicide is a major red flag. If depression is diagnosed, Jacobs recommends addressing it as a team. “If you tell a depressed person to get help, he may feel even worse,” Jacobs says. “Approach it by asking, ‘How can we combat this together?’”