Rules of the Game

We choose to stay in love. We have traversed parenting, careers, finances, the loss of a pregnancy and loved ones, and fussing over whose turn it is to cook breakfast. He watches Pride and Prejudice for me, and I watch Ultimate Fighting Championship for him. We’ve changed, but we still choose each other.
Leah Moon
Toledo, Ohio

My husband and I always make sure that the bedroom is our private place. Not just for physical intimacy, but for having a space to talk and be together.
Carol Czerniawski
Palatine, Illinois

Knowing the grass isn’t greener on the other side. My husband and I married a bit later than the average couple, and by then we had both had plenty of time to “sow our oats.” We truly love one another and never wonder “what if,” mainly because we’ve been there and done that. We know we want to be together, without question.
Amy Dodson
Richmond, Virginia

My father asked me this same question when I was in college. Full of know-it-all, psychology-major cockiness, I answered, “Love and trust.” “Wrong,” he said. Stumped, I followed up with “Communication.” Wrong again. His answer: sex and money. If a couple can’t get those two things right, then they’re not going to be happy. After eight years of marriage, my husband still chases me around the house, and courting expenses are built into the budget.
Joneis Thomas
Colonial Beach, Virginia

Something to Talk About

National Public Radio! My husband and I spend a lot of time during the week driving in separate cars. We both listen to NPR. At the end of the day, when we are done talking about work, one of us will say, “Did you hear the piece about…?” It’s nice to have so much to discuss.
Amy J. Fischer
East Patchogue, New York

The key to a happy marriage is speaking the same language. My husband and I both speak sarcasm fluently.
Stacey Lerner
Beverly Hills, Michigan

My husband and I live an hour and a half away from our parents. Those long drives give us time to vent about our families, talk about our pasts, and reaffirm our bond. The kids sleep, and we connect — he talks to me more in the car in that small amount of time than in a whole month at home.
Mickie Stiers
Columbus, Ohio

My husband of 35 years and I agree that every couple should go out of town yearly, without the children, and follow this not-so-simple rule: “You cannot discuss the kids or your jobs.” It is amazing how much you can find to talk about.
Franki Chabalewski
Richmond, Virginia