Mother’s Intuition

One winter afternoon in 1950, my mother sat in her bedroom and wrote a letter to me. The unusual thing about this was that I wasn’t born until 1957. At 15, she knew in her heart that one day she’d have a daughter, and she wanted to share a moment of her childhood with her child. The letter describes aspects of her life, her loves, her hopes, and her dreams. Upon finishing, she hid the letter in her secret place, the false bottom of her jewelry box, to keep for me until I was 15. Two days before my 15th birthday, she discovered the long-forgotten letter while cleaning and gave it to me. This special letter ended with my favorite piece of advice from my mother, which was to look for the best in everything, words that I took to heart and try my best to follow.
Marjorie Hodges
Shreveport, Louisiana

For my mom’s 75th birthday, I had no idea what to give her — she really didn’t need anything. So I got a red journal with a big heart on the front. Inside, on each of 75 pages, I wrote one piece of advice Mom had given me over the years. Some were funny, some were life-changing, some were sentimental, but they reinforced what a great influence a mom can have.
Pattie Cox
Mequon, Wisconsin

When I was a teenager and my heart was broken for the first time, my mother let me stay home from school for a day. She told me to stay in my pajamas, listen to sad songs, eat whatever I wanted, cry all day, and generally feel sorry for myself. She said, “Everyone is entitled to mourn their broken heart for one day. But tomorrow you must be the woman you know you are, regardless of who is sharing your life.” Obviously, my heart didn’t heal in one day, but allowing myself the “down time” made me stronger the next day. I’ve used that advice many times in my life and sometimes found in my day of mourning a piece of me that had been lost for a while.
Jamie Stewart
Chesterfield, Virginia

The most important advice my mother ever gave me was not through her words, but through her actions. My mother took time to teach me how to make mud pies, she took me outside to dance in the rain, she helped me catch daddy longlegs — and in doing so, she taught me to enjoy life. It was through these things she showed me: In all our lives there is a little dirt and a little rain, but that’s OK, because we can still find time to have fun.
Stephanie Karpicke
St. Louis, Missouri

Man Handling

"Marry a man who will gladly eat a sandwich for dinner."
Kathy Owen
Memphis, Tennessee

Just before my wedding day, 21 years ago, my mother took me aside and told me that if I could accept that my fiancé’s worst habit would become magnified several times over during the course of our life together, to go ahead and marry him, but under no circumstances should I think I could change him. It worked: We are the happiest married couple I know.
Jane Hutchison
Langley, British Columbia

My mother’s greatest advice to me was to keep my marriage as my highest priority, even over the kids. The kids will grow up and leave, but you will still have your husband. Although it may have seemed a bit harsh when she said it, today, as a married mother of two, I understand completely what she meant. It’s not that you love your kids any less, but you need to make your marriage a priority to pull it through the child-rearing years and have a strong relationship when the two of you are alone again.
Sarah Lint
Bolivar, Ohio

It was during one of those “mother-daughter hanging out in the kitchen cooking” afternoons that my mother said, “Don’t forget you need both lust and love to be happily married. Because when you fall out of love, you always have lust to tide you over until you fall back in love with each other.” So every time I want to strangle my husband, I try to drag him off to bed instead. Works like a charm — most of the time.
Kate Ramos
Sacramento, California

My mom always used to say, “Never trust a boy who winks.” I guess she wanted her three daughters to marry respectable, serious, and upstanding men (like my orthopedic-surgeon father). Well, I married the funniest man in the world, whom my mom adores. I’ve never seen a woman eat her words so fast as the first day Josh, my husband, winked at my mom.
Blair Jones
Shelby, North Carolina

The best piece of advice my mother gave me was the same piece of advice her mother gave her on her wedding day: “Cultivate a short memory.” While my grandmother, now 94, was strictly giving my mother sound relationship advice, I have found that this simple mantra has served me well far beyond the boundaries of my marriage.
Karrin Taylor
Scottsdale, Arizona

The Kids Are All Right

When my son was born, my mother gave me some advice I have never forgotten. She said, “There is one thing that stands now and forever between your child and the harsh world — you!”
Laurie Triola
Edinboro, Pennsylvania

Even though she came from a generation of stay-at-home moms, my mother has always been supportive of my decision to work. She reminds me that I shouldn’t feel guilty for having ambition, that my kids are great kids, and that my working will have a positive effect on my family. I think of her words when I go through those internal struggles that every working mom goes through and know that it will be OK.
Christine Montaquila
Chicago, Illinois

I married much later in life than many of my friends. When I was single and wondering if I would ever have children, my mother said, “You don’t need to have children to have an influence on a child’s life.” Thanks to that sage advice, I became more involved in the lives of the children I knew and volunteered to help the children I didn’t. I am now a mother and a high school teacher, but her words will stay with me forever.
Margaret Larson
Elk Grove, California

During my senior year of college, my best friend and I decided we wanted to move to San Francisco and start a new, adventurous chapter of life in an exciting, worldly environment. I was nervous about getting my mother’s opinion on this, but when I did tell her, her response was “Well, honey, that’s why I gave you wings!” I still think of that moment, when I realized my mother always wanted me to see the world and live new experiences every day.
Alison von Pushendorf
Sleepy Hollow, New York

"Wear a girdle so your assets don’t fall down."
Sandy Lewis
Redford, Michigan

Despite her best efforts, my mother had a tomboy for a daughter. She limited her protests, however, to the morning drop-off at school, saying on a daily basis, “Be a good girl, and sit like a lady.” I may have had messy hair and grass stains on my pants, but my legs were always neatly crossed in class.
Lindy Vogado
Richmond, Virginia

Growing up, I thought that I should be shopping in the best, most expensive places. My mother would always tell me, “If you have nice taste, you can shop anywhere.” Thanks to her, I do have nice taste, and, yes, I will shop anywhere.
Beth Carrigan
South Hamilton, Massachusetts

"Never let a man watch you put on a pair of panty hose.” Think about it, ladies: It’s not a pretty picture.
Denise Miller
Stockton, California

"A little red lipstick can make a girl’s whole day."
Jani Smith
Denver, Colorado

“Embrace your age, wrinkles, and gray hair. You’ve earned them.”
Valentina Pasquinelli
Mount Vernon, Illinois

“If it doesn’t look good, keep it covered.”
Lisa Vickery
Hoboken, New Jersey