A socially graceful child may go further in life than one with perfect SAT scores. Parents can ensure that their kids' conversational proficiency develops alongside their verbal and mathematical reasoning skills by teaching politeness early. Here are some tips on preparing your child for talking with grown-ups.

Follow the Golden Rule of Parenting. Children, especially younger ones, learn conversational skills by imitating adults. "Always behave the way you want your child to behave," says Peggy Post, coauthor of The Gift of Good Manners: A Parent's Guide to Raising Respectful, Kind, Considerate Children (HarperResource, $17, www.amazon.com). Encourage your children to take turns when speaking, make eye contact, include a third party in the conversation, and speak with respect by doing the same.

Adjust your expectations to your child's age. "Don't overwhelm a two-year-old by trying to teach him something a 10-year-old should be doing," says Post. Children younger than four can easily learn to say "hello," "good-bye," "please," and "May I be excused?" and to understand the difference between indoor and outdoor voices. But it takes the ability to empathize with others, which develops around age five, for them to engage in more effective two-way conversation.

Have conversations with your child. Find topics wherever you are — the mall, the grocery store, the dinner table. It gets them used to speaking and shows that you want to hear what they think, encouraging a respectful exchange. It also allows you to explain why we do and don't say certain things. "Treating the child as a functioning person with feelings helps her develop an awareness that others are functioning people with feelings," says Janet Brown Lobel, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Mount Kisco, New York.