If you think you and your spouse can essentially agree on who will get what, you can probably sort things out with the help of a mediator rather than a lawyer. (To find one, go to www.acresolution.org, or ask for referrals through the court.) "Mediation often takes less time and money," says Emily Doskow, family-law editor at Nolo, adding that "because of the ever rising costs of divorce litigation, it is an increasingly popular option." The mediator (usually a family lawyer who doesn't represent either spouse) meets with both parties to assist with paperwork and decision-making. Since both people are more actively involved in outlining the terms of the divorce, "mediated agreements tend to be adhered to more than court-ordered agreements," says Doskow. Another option is to use a lawyer only for more complicated parts of the divorce — for example, preparing the order necessary to divide retirement savings.

TIP: If you have kids, consider consulting a child-custody evaluator — a child psychologist or other mental-health professional who can provide an objective assessment of the children's best interests.

WHAT YOU CAN SAVE: The average American divorce costs between $15,000 and $30,000 in legal fees. "If a divorce is strongly contested, it can be unbelievably expensive," says Doskow. The cost of a mediated divorce rarely exceeds $5,000.

WHAT YOU RISK: Putting in a lot of work only to reach an impasse and wind up in court anyway.

GET A LAWYER IF:

Your spouse has retained one.

You and your spouse cannot communicate, much less agree on anything.

You fear your emotional state will cloud or encumber your decision-making process.

There is a good deal of money or property at stake — especially pension or retirement plans.

Your spouse is an abuser (physical, substance, or otherwise).

FOR MORE INFORMATION:

Using Divorce Mediation: Save Your Money & Your Sanity, by Katherine E. Stoner, $30, www.amazon.com.

Divorce & Money: How to Make the Best Financial Decisions During Divorce, by Violet Woodhouse, $35, www.amazon.com.

The Divorce Mediation Answer Book, by Dolores Deane Walker and Carol A. Butler, $16, www.amazon.com.

How to File Your Own Divorce, by Edward A. Haman, $25, www.amazon.com.