What to Do: Turn cleaning into a game. “Do it with your child the first time so she knows what clean looks like,” says educational psychologist Michele Borba. Then pin up photos of each area in its clean state for her to refer to in the future. This can work for kids from as young as three (who can’t read but who can understand pictures) to up to about age 10 (who enjoy it for the fun of taking — and starring in — the photos). For household cleaning, engage the whole family in a spirited game of “beat the clock.” Set an oven timer for five minutes, hand each family member a tool for one chore — broom, basket, bathroom cleanser — and “Go!”

What Not to Do: Don’t compare your child with her neatnik older sibling.

Sample Script: “Let’s play a game to see how quickly you can make your room look exactly like the photographs. The faster you do it, the sooner you’ll be able to go out and play.”