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Sofa bedEllen Silverman Page 1 of 23
Modern Manners

Etiquette Questions, Answered: Entertaining and Guests

Real Simple's Modern Manners columnist helps you avoid committing an entertaining faux pas.

Is It Rude To Have Overnight Guests Sleep on My Couch?

Q. I don’t have a guest room. When a friend or a relative visits me, must I offer my own bedroom, or is it acceptable to have her sleep on my pullout sofa?

Tanya Bair

Carlisle, Pennsylvania

A. Is this person your mother? Your elderly aunt? Any close, older family member automatically gets the bed. Otherwise it depends on the circumstances. If you’ve invited a friend to visit and assured her of a comfortable stay, you’re obliged to make her trip as pleasant as possible. That means offering her the bedroom—though she may well decline. But if you’re doing someone a favor (maybe a long-lost college roommate asks to crash at your place), it’s perfectly reasonable to offer the sofa. Just be up-front about the accommodations before your guest arrives so she isn’t surprised or disappointed.

―Michelle Slatalla

Next: Should I Give a Tour of My House When Someone New Comes Over?
Skip to Daily Finds slides.
Sofa bed
Dollhouse
Presents on a table
Thanksgiving spread
Cocktail Party Invitation
Guests at an outdoor party lit by a patio fire pit
Assortment of wine bottles and a wine rack
table with empty glasses, wine bottle and vodka
Muddy, yellow boots on carpet
One woman speaking to another woman
Bed and night stand with bouquet of flowers and calendar
Group of friends enjoying a meal together
Guests at a dinner party
Sofa bed
Woman holding a tray of drinks
Dinner party
Crane & Co. Pacifier baby shower invitation
A pet cat steps off a piano onto a stool
Guests at a buffet
Fully-stocked refrigerator

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